'...I have called you friends...' John 15:15 NKJV
Another step in developing your friendship with God is choosing to be honest with Him! God doesn't expect you to be perfect, but He does expect you to be honest. If perfection was a requirement not one of us would qualify. In the Bible, God's friends were honest about their feelings-sometimes even complaining and arguing with Him-yet He didn't seem to mind. In fact, He encouraged it. God listened patiently to David's accusations of unfairness, betrayal and abandonment. He didn't zap Jeremiah for claiming God had tricked him. Job was allowed to vent his bitterness and God actually defended him for being honest. On the other hand, He rebuked Job's friends for faking it: '...I am angry with you... because you did not speak the truth about Me, the way...Job did. Job will pray for you, and I will answer his prayer...' (Job 42:7-8 GNT) To be God's friend you must share your true feelings with Him, not what you think you ought to feel or say. Until you understand that God uses everything for good in our lives, you'll harbor resentment towards Him over your looks, your nationality, your economic background, your unanswered prayers, your past hurts, and the things you'd change if you were God. Actually, revealing your feelings and releasing your resentments to Him are the first steps to becoming spiritually whole. Isn't it encouraging to know that God's closest friends felt just like we do but, instead of masking their feelings in pious cliché, they voiced them openly? Why? Because expressing them leads to healing and a deeper level of intimacy with Him.
'...I have called you friends...' John 15:15 NKJV
Friendship with God is maintained and strengthened through continual meditation. It's impossible to be God's friend apart from knowing what He says. You can't love God unless you know Him, and that's only possible through the Bible. '...He revealed Himself to Samuel through His Word.' (1 Samuel 3:21 NIV) Now you can't spend all day studying the Bible, but you can think about it throughout the day, recalling verses you've read, mulling over them in your mind. Meditation isn't some mysterious ritual, it's simply focused thinking-a skill anybody can learn. When you think about a problem over and over, that's called worry. When you think about God's Word over and over, that's called meditation. If you know how to worry, you know how to meditate. Just switch your attention from the problem to the solution! The more you meditate on God's Word the less you'll have to worry about. The more time you spend meditating on the Scriptures the more you'll understand their secrets. The Psalmist said, 'The friendship of the Lord is for those who fear Him, and He makes known to them His covenant.' (Psalm 25:14 ESV) After Jesus told His disciples, '...I have called you friends...', He went on to say, '...I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit, and that your fruit should remain, that whatever you ask the Father in My name He may give you.' (John 15:16 NKJV) The benefits of friendship with God include abundant living and answered prayer. So if you want to become God's friend, read, digest and meditate in His Word.
'Let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.' James 1:4 NKJV
Just because it hasn't happened yet doesn't mean it won't, or that God has changed His mind. While you are waiting-God is working. The timing may not be right for Him to get the ultimate glory and you the ultimate benefit. That's why James writes: 'Let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.' Impatience is a sign of immaturity. Have you noticed that children can't wait for anything? But a wise parent knows what's best. God sets His watch to accomplish His purpose, not ours. Paul writes: 'We know that all things work...according to His purpose.' (See Romans 8:28). When you clearly understand God's purpose you won't permit things that are contrary to it, including hurry and worry. You'll also know how to allocate your time, your effort and your money-where to go and where not to go. God says, 'I make known the end from the beginning.' (Isaiah 46:10 NIV) First God sets the goal, then He determines the steps that lead to it. And what are we supposed to do while we are waiting? Listen: 'Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior.' (Habakkuk 3:17-18 NIV) Begin praising the Lord today for what He's going to do for you-because He absolutely will come through for you!
'...To bestow...beauty instead of ashes...' Isaiah 61:3 NIV
The Chinese have an interesting symbol for the word 'crisis'; it indicates both danger and opportunity. When the stakes are high and the outcome in doubt, purpose can emerge from pain like beauty from ashes. But real healing can't begin until you face the facts and express your pain. That means doing what David did: taking it to God. 'How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart?' (Psalm 13:2 NIV) Just as lancing a boil is a necessary first step to healing, facing the truth is the first step towards becoming whole. Those who grow through a crisis learn which hopes, dreams and expectations were violated by the event. They identify where the repair work is needed, then they develop a road map for the future. At first you will feel as if 'nothing will ever be the same again'. That's normal. You may have to make adjustments in how you work, where you spend your leisure time, and how you relate to your family and friends. It's the nature of a crisis to destabilize your world. But it also forces you to reach deep within yourself and find hidden strength you didn't know existed. You may not feel courageous or hopeful right now, but that doesn't mean those things aren't there waiting to be tapped. Even though you don't feel strong today, you can draw strength from the One who is. 'The Lord is my Rock, my Fortress, and my Deliverer; my God...in Whom I will trust...' (Psalm 18:2 AMP) Face it. Find God in it. Follow Him, and He will give you a better tomorrow.
'...Turn...me, and I shall be turned...' Jeremiah 31:18 KJV
If you are tired of feeling like a victim, read this it is powerful and may just empower you: 'I don't want to feel this way anymore. I thought if my pain touched their lives I'd feel better. I didn't. I thought by holding it over their heads I'd feel better. I didn't. I thought by telling everyone what they'd done to me I'd feel better. I didn't; it only cost me friends and kept the pain alive. I thought if they acknowledged how wrong they've been I'd feel better. It didn't. I thought if I could understand why I pick such relationships I'd feel better. So I read books and talked with counselors. But that didn't work, because then I uncovered other issues I didn't have the emotional energy to deal with. I thought time would make me feel better. It helped, but it didn't heal, because there were still too many things that triggered old memories. I thought by moving to a new house in a new city and getting a new job I'd feel better. I didn't; I only changed addresses, not what was going on inside me. Finally, I did two things that worked; not overnight, but gradually, patiently, consistently as I kept doing them, they worked. First, I decided to forgive-and keep forgiving until the past no longer controlled me. Secondly, I cried out to God, Turn...me, and I shall be turned. He answered my prayer. My perceptions began to clear and my heart began to heal. Why? Because at last, getting well meant more, so much more to me than remaining a victim.'
'...Live...as temporary residents on earth...' 1 Peter 1:17 GWT
The fact that this world is not our ultimate home explains why we experience difficulty, disappointment and rejection. It also explains why some promises seem unfulfilled, some prayers unanswered, and some circumstances unfair. This life is not the end of the story! In order to keep us from becoming too attached to this world, God allows us to feel a certain amount of discontent-longings that will never be fulfilled this side of Heaven. We're not completely happy here because we're not supposed to be! Indeed, we won't be in Heaven two seconds before we'll look around and say, 'Why did I place such importance on earthly things?' The truth is, at death you don't leave home, you go home! Imagine being an ambassador in a hostile nation. You would have to learn its language and adapt to its customs. You couldn't isolate yourself. To fulfill your mission you'd have to understand what's going on and know how to relate to those around you. But what if you fell in love with that country, preferring it to your own? Your loyalty and commitment would be compromised. Instead of representing your country, you'd start acting like a traitor. The Bible says, '...We are Christ's ambassadors...' (2 Corinthians 5:20 NLT) So don't get too attached to what's around you, because it's temporary. 'Those who use the things of the world should not become attached to them. For this world as we know it will soon pass away.' (1 Corinthians 7:31 NLT) So use it, maximize it to fulfill God's purposes, but don't fall in love with it!
'...Everyone who loves is born of God...' 1 John 4:7 NKJV
Recently, a 12-year-old boy in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, hanged himself. Why? Because the next day was his first day at a new school, he was overweight, and he dreaded being taunted by other children. Few things are more painful than shame. One of the greatest kindnesses we can show others is to take away their false shame through love and acceptance. When the disciples met a man who was blind from birth they asked Jesus, '...Was it because of his own sins or his parents' sins?' (John 9:2 NLT) They weren't concerned that the man needed help or that he'd spent his life in total darkness. No, they started discussing his shortcomings-right in front of him! It's easier to label people than love them. We label things because we think we know what's inside, and we label people for the same reason. We'd rather debate homosexuality than befriend someone who's gay, condemn divorce than help its victims, argue about abortion than support an orphanage, or gripe about social services than help the poor. Jesus didn't see this blind man as a victim of fate, he saw him as an opportunity waiting to happen. He said to His disciples, '...This happened so the power of God can be seen in him.' (John 9:3 NLT) If you don't love people, you don't love God; actually, you don't even know Him! You need to pray, 'Lord, remind me today that the greatest gift I have to give others is Your love.' When you get serious and begin to pray that way, people will open up to God's help and healing.
