o Four attitudes that preserve unity:
Each of the four attitudes that Paul writes about in this passage are very similar. Each of them are an antidote to the “me-first”, self-centered culture that we live in today. We’ve already addressed that issue several times in our journey through Ephesians, We’ve seen that the church was never intended to strictly be a place where I come to get my own needs met, but rather it is a place where the followers of Jesus Christ come together to serve each other and our world so that we can demonstrate the manifold wisdom of God both here on earth and in the heavens. In order for that to happen, we need to develop these four key attitudes:
§ Humility
The word for humility literally means to think lowly of oneself. It means that I put the needs of others ahead of my own. I particularly like Lawrence Richards’ definition of humility:
“It is not a weak man’s surrender, but a strong man’s rejection of selfishness and determination to be actively concerned with the needs and interests of others.”
Without a doubt, the best example of humility is Jesus Christ. Paul very vividly describes that humility for us in Philippians 2 where he describes how Jesus gave up all the glory of heaven to come to this earth to meet our greatest need – a need that we could never meet on our own. A church that is full of people who are here to meet the needs of others, rather than to focus on their own needs will never have a problem with keeping the unity.
§ Gentleness
This word could also be translated “meekness”, as it is in the KJV. But unfortunately in our culture that word carries with it the connotation of weakness. But the word Paul uses here is a word that indicates power under control. It is a word that Jesus used to describe Himself:
“Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” Matthew 11:29 (NIV)
Certainly Jesus wasn’t weak, but he was gentle or meek in the sense that the great power he possessed was always under control. In other words, gentleness means that rather than fighting for my rights, I focus on what is best for others. Again, when we have a church full of people with that kind of attitude, preserving unity is an easy task.
§ Patience
The word Paul uses here is a word that literally means “long tempered”. The KJV very accurately renders this word “longsuffering”. Vine’s defines it as “...that quality of self-restraint in the face of provocation which does not hastily retaliate or promptly punish...” It is the same word used to describe God’s attitude toward us.
[Patience] is the spirit which bears insult and injury without bitterness and without complaint. It is the spirit which can suffer unpleasant people with graciousness and fools without irritation.
In the church, this means that we’re willing to put up with people that insult us and frustrate us. It means that, just like God does with us, we’re willing to put up with the actions of others that hurt us without seeking to get even. It means that we’re willing to put up with those who are less spiritually mature and often don’t know any better. Obviously that doesn’t mean that we don’t deal with conspicuous sin or that we don’t try to encourage others to grow spiritually. But it does mean being willing to be long-tempered with those people and allow God to work in their lives in His own time.
§ Bearing with one another
While Paul encourages unity; he never expects uniformity in the body. Every one of us has different personalities, abilities and temperaments. Paul is encouraging his readers to make allowances for the uniqueness of each individual part of the body. It means that we are to allow for the faults and failures of others. Once again, Paul is not saying that we are to tolerate blatant sin in the body, but we are to put up with and tolerate those who are different than us. Bearing with one another is more than just an outward façade. It is a decision to love others in spite of our differences. You are loved!
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